Should You Be Worried if You Find Your Partner’s Dildo
Finding a partner’s dildo may be unsettling especially if you’re not used to seeing sex toys. However, people use them for perfectly natural reasons. If it’s bothering you, here’s what you can do.
Think about what’s worrying you. Seeing a dildo may cause an automatic reaction in you, but remember: it’s not the item that evokes your feelings; it’s what you believe about it that does. Take some time in specifying what’s going on in your mind. If you want, write these down so you can tackle them one by one.
Are you worried that you’re not that good in bed? Guys sometimes do, because it’s common knowledge that women fake sexual satisfaction to please their man. It may feel uncomfortable at first, but it will do you good if you ask her about how sexually satisfied she is with you. Mention that you have seen the dildo and it’s giving you the impression that the sex is not that fulfilling for her. Listen to her feedback and modify your actions accordingly. Figure out how to include the toy in your trysts. Once you get past your pride and give what she needs, both of you will have better times in bed.
Do you treat a dildo as a sign of being sexually adventurous? First, clarify what you mean by this. Do non-traditional ways of achieving sexual satisfaction threaten your sense of familiarity? Do you assume that a sexually creative person is more impulsive and prone to promiscuity? If you said yes to either of the question, consider discussing these issues with your partner. If you don’t know about how she’s doing sexually, it’s better to ask than guess because it’s very easy to accuse a person of things she isn’t. Trust is very important in sex; encourage this by talking to each other more often.
Things get a bit more complicated if your partner is a guy. The question will be: what’s that dildo for? Is he using it for his own satisfaction? If yes, it might mean that your partner has homosexual tendencies OR simply that he wants to be stimulated that way. Again, it’s best to ask him directly instead of making assumptions. Accept whatever he tells you – people have the right to have their own sexual desires. If he has a dildo and he has never used it with you before (and it looks used), then it’s best to reevaluate your relationship and your agreements of fidelity. However, it’s possible that he got the dildo for you – ask him and don’t be afraid to try it out.
When you handle these important concerns, other things you might want to know to decrease your anxieties are details about the dildo itself. What is it made of? Is it safe to be used – are the parts sturdy, comfortable, and hypoallergenic? How do you use it properly? You can find these information in the following: the manual, the website selling them, or in reviews. (Recommended site: bestdildo.net) Remember, people use sex toys all the time. If it upsets you, find out as much information as you can. Knowledge often cures fear, even if it’s about dildos.